Posted by: peterhact | February 1, 2012

The highly photogenic and stunning Search and Destroy Cat Module

The Search and Destroy Cat module is getting old. This is true. Any attempt of “maddies” now has a result of lazing around for at least half the day to recover. There are side effects for me for this behavior, ranging for blessed relief when I discover he is alive – I know it won’t always be the case, I will find his shell when he goes to cat heaven, (sounds like he is a cicada, but when he is hungry, he drowns them out) to being trapped whilst gardening because he has decided that the weeds I want to pull up are just the right softness for him to lie spread eagled on. He still has plenty left in that tank of pure evil, so I know he will be around for a bit yet.

The other cat, the one that died last year used to nibble on my leg with what she thought were love bites. None of that soft stuff from the S&D Cat Module. If he is nibbling, he is tasting to see if I am ready to consume, or it is past his dinner time. Dinner time has never been nailed down to a specific time. It appears that he decides when he is hungry based on the most inopportune moment for me. (hands full of shopping bags, garden tools, or, in desperate circumstances, children)

Here he is, grumpy:

What did I do to earn this scorn? why was he looking like the devil cat? I took his picture without permission. I thought I would take some photos of him for the memories that they would invoke. this photo gained me a “love nibble”. I have scratches, bites, I mean, anybody else would have given up and decided he was a feral cat, not a pet. (sometimes, i am inclined to agree) I have found that he is best photographed when he is resting, so as to prevent giving chase.

So that is what I did. But ever the canny animal, he was on to me:

Me: Come on ******s, hold still for a photo. Cat: Bugger Off!

This resulted into a chase around the backyard, where he damn near got me:

And then he did:

Finally, after agreeing to allow him to set the pose and the location, I got a good shot and limped off to put antiseptic cream on yet more shin scratches.

This is the official highly photogenic and stunning Search and Destroy Cat Module Portrait.

I bow to my highly superior Furry Overlord.

No, I am not being funny.

Oh, I don’t think that people will see it as being funny, you are a great looking cat.

No, I am not editing the photo to give you “improvements”.

You are covered with fur!

No, it isn’t dinner time.

No, scratching me won’t get you fed faster.

Oh.

If I “fall down”, it will?

What do you mean?

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