Posted by: peterhact | November 4, 2012

How do you create a feral cat? Answer: buy a cat enclosure…

When the S&D Cat module had escaped into the wild blue yonder, for the umpteenth time, A cat enclosure was purchased. This was ancient history – and bears no resemblance to the current version of his “stay close to home in case I move without him” theory. After all, if I pack up, he will be primed to move. The cat enclosure, or raptor cage as we came to refer to it had two marked impacts: 1. the cat couldn’t reach the kids and 2. they damn well knew it.

Putting fingers into the cage became a new sport – one that was akin to inserting sharpened stakes. The cat could see the fingers, but he just couldn’t reach them. He knew that if he did, it would involve Shouting and Crying, which would  probably end in being fed gruel and sleeping in the enclosure.

It appeared to him to be a jail – what was wrong with the “Leaping The Fence Exercise Guide For Owners?”  That was a bestseller. Many of our friends had cats that had subscribed to the follow up series “Now That You Are Out, Climb A Tree And Cry A Lot”,  or the ever popular “Dogs: A Survival Technique Involving  Fluffyitis” or the lesser known “Time To Go Home And Sit On The Front Mat, Yowling To Come In”. He was providing a public service to all cats, and if we hadn’t installed the raptor cage, maybe the world would have been graced with his “Songs To Sing On The Fence At 3am, With Bonus Violin And Bagpipe Imitation”  album. The world has no clue how close they came to that particular form of torture. I do. He sounds me out on a few every night, when he wants to come in, go out or just when I have dropped off to sleep.

There was the impromptu concert he held, but he had to retire after a well aimed shoe knocked him off the fence. I gave the neighbor back the shoe the next day…. It was very funny, but he didn’t think so, after he noticed that the shoe looked like it had been through a shredder. next time, he would use a brick. Then, to his relief, we moved.

Back to the title. The S&D cat module was feral. probably before the enclosure, but I can’t blame the pet store, after all, they turn out heaps of well adjusted cats, I just lucked out. Yay, me.

Can you tell I am happy with the luck I have had re well adjusted cats?

How do you convert a nasty cat into a feral one?

Easy. lock him in a cage and then, when he is used to it, after years of conditioning, take the damn thing away.

He won’t lie on the cat bed anymore, he lurks around the house and leaps onto toes,  I have damaged him a lot.

(He has damaged me a lot, too)

Now he is watching me from on top of the pantry. Standing by for “Cat Who Thinks He Can Fly – An Autobiography”…

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